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"If my particular passion ever kills me, it won't be because I was on my horse's back... It will be because I was gaping out of my car window at some horse standing innocently in a field when I was supposed to be paying attention to the road."

Monday, June 9, 2014

Demo Psychology

Doing a demo is such an interesting thing.  I think it says a lot about a person. You have to be brave to want to get out in front of anyone with something as personal as horsemanship - brave, or supremely dedicated to your horse!

This past weekend, me and Mo went out to the local fancy equestrian park with two other Parelli Professionals to show the area what Parelli is all about. I think we were very successful, and shared our message in an appropriate way.

Its everything that goes into sharing that message that has been making me think, over the last few days. First, there is the OH BOY factor in originally signing up. That point when you go "YEY! I get to ride at X Fancy place!". The joy of sharing that message with everyone you know - the "HEY! Im going to be riding here on X date! Come support us!" That part is one of my favorites. I love getting people excited about coming out to fun events.

After that comes the "Oh, I guess I better make sure my horse is ready for this" part, when you go out and play with your horse and practice the fun stuff you want to share. For me, this time around, it was pretty interesting. Firstly, Mo was just coming off an injury, so I wanted her to have as much recovery time as possible, before starting to push her buttons, so we didnt DO a lot. Secondly, the first time I did try and test out my  bridleless FreeStyle - which is usually our specialty - Mo was a crazy gooberball. She was tight, tense, fast, over reactive, and generally not a super demo horse to watch. It was such an odd ride that night. She was doing what I asked, sure, but there was just so much.... internal fizziness... that it just wasnt pretty or fun looking. It was extra interesting, because its the first time I can remember consciously thinking "Relax, go through the process, it will all work out and be fine tomorrow. Embrace the messy". I totally surprised myself on that one. My inner voice was so calm and blasé about the whole incident! When did that happen? [Im usually one of those terribly perfectionist type people] Apparently Ive turned a new leaf.

That whole thought process in and of itself caught me so off guard. But, apparently, I was completely correct. The next day, I went out, saddled up, hopped on, and VOILA. My perfect demo horse was back! Now, what all that fussyness and crazy business was about the day before, I will never know. What I do know, is that I guess my inner self was right, because once I embraced the messy, it resolved itself, and my normal pony came back to me.

Going into this event I wasnt to sure about Mo's fitness level. That tends to be the one thing I worry over, when taking my horse places. We have a lot of pasture. She is fairly round. And due to her time off, she wasnt/isnt in the best shape of her life. Turns out I had nothing to worry about. But I still dont like to over-face my horse and leave her exhausted by accident.  We had maybe a handful of rides before the actual day. She was so good though, I wasnt going to over stress it.

After you know your horse is ready, its time to get YOU ready. Getting myself ready for these things, is probably the hardest part. I always forget things. This time, I forgot my BUSINESS CARDS. Seriously. I thought I had everything. Every. Single. Thing. Any yet, somehow, that one little IMPORTANT cardboard box, sitting on my desk, got left behind. *sigh*  Luckily, I have 5 or so in my wallet, to put in my display, so it didnt look too sad.

Getting to the venue on the morning of is usually somewhat chaotic. This time, I felt fairly prepared, and woke up early before my alarm, so I had loads of time. Mo loaded like a pro, and we hit the road with Derek in tow for once. That was nice :) Having a someone to keep me on schedule and make sure I eat/drink enough water and to collect the various things I forget in various places was a real treat at this event!

Setting up the booth went pretty well. We were so lucky to have a super helper team - so I really didnt even have to do anything! By the time Mo and Toby were settled, I  went back and voila, gorgeous booth! Having a super support team can really make or break a day! I am so appreciative of the people who came out to help us!

Talking to people is the easy part for me. I love to say hi and share all of our free stuff! Somehow, it was already time for us to get the ponies ready for our first demo though! Mo was in heat, so she had made a mess of her back legs.... ew... and needed a quick wash up. After washing her up, I  didnt really have time for a warm up, so we kind of saddled up and hoped for the best!

Going into the arena for the first time is always a rush! A) ITS HUGE [grand prix stadium ring!] B) there are PEOPLE watching! C) You want to show Parelli at its BEST for all the people who have never seen it before.... no pressure.

Our music was great though. Started out nice and slow, and let us get in and get comfy before bringing out the exciting tunes to do exciting stuff to. It usually takes me about 30 seconds to forget where I am and who is watching me, and to totally and completely become absorbed in my horse. This isnt unusual for me at all. This happens at home too... I lose hours and hours when it does!

Mo was a total rock star. Allow me to re-iterate. SHE WAS A ROCK STAR!  She was spot on, perfect. I couldnt have asked for more! We played, we laughed, we had fun, we rode, we had some goofies, and then somehow it was over? That fast, it was time to finish up!

Looking back at the pictures is always my favorite part - I always wonder if it looks like as much fun as I am having in the moment. Sometimes, when you are having fun and concentrating hard, you forget to tell your face to smile and tell the world you are having fun. Seeing the photos from this event, there was no doubt I was having the most fun time out in the arena with my pony :) Im glad my brain remembers to tell my face ;)

Demo # 2 was so much more mellow. I didnt really have any expectations of Mo, given that she gave me her all in the first time slot. She pulled out all the stops once more for me though! That pony is all heart! I love her so much! I didnt even blink at the crowd the second time, I just went and had fun with my best pony, and it showed, to her, I think. Thats why she gave me so much, all over again.

It was such a great day, with so many great memories made, and hopefully many new friends!

   - S

Monday, March 24, 2014

The End of An Era

One of my most cherished and favorite times in my life has came to an end on Saturday around lunch time. My dog Ajax slipped away into the afterlife, quickly and without pain in the end. It was the worst moment of my life this far. A moment that I have been dreading in the back of my mind for a while now, knowing that thirteen and a half years old for such a big fluffy fella was a lot. The only thing I can come with that might supersede the pain of Saturday will be the day Mo goes...

Things went quickly, and for that I am grateful. I never want any one to suffer. Friday night all was well, he was tail wagging and stalking me around the house eating cookies. Saturday morning he went out for his usual yard tour and then we got a freak snow storm. He was napping on the front porch, becoming a snow dog when I brought him inside. At first I didnt think anything was really wrong - sure his hips were stiff, but that has been semi-common the last week or so, on and off. Having to carry/drag him in just seemed par for the course lately.

When he got in though, things were different. Subtly, slowly at first, but then progressing faster. At first his breathing rate was just elevated. Not to all out panting, just .... heavier. Harder. Like his tummy hurt. I tried to give him a treat but he wouldnt take it. Not even CHEESE. That was a big uh-oh. He drank water though, so that was good.

The day was a busy one around the house, while D and his father went about lifting and re-setting the floor with insulation. Trying, one step at a time to make out drafty old house just a little bit warmer. I, luckily, wasnt needed to help so I sat on the floor in the front room with my old fluffy pal and snuggled him, while trying to red light away his pain. He wasnt comfortable, kept shifting from laying flat to laying up on his belly - but I thought maybe his hips were bothering him.

Then I noticed he started drooling. Jax NEVER drools! That was a big red flag. Then I noticed he had peed himself - just a little. Another big red flag. I started to panic. Ill admit it. All my biggest fears were coming true, I could feel it, and I wasnt ready! Jax was supposed to get another bad haircut this summer. Jax was supposed to be a best man at my wedding, in his little [big] doggy tux. Jax still needed to run over Varo a few more times so he stops going to the road!

He gave me the look though. That look that sees right through your soul and tells you its time. I wanted so much for him to be able to just pass quietly in his sleep one night. No pain or fear or car rides to the vet. At the same time though, I am thankful I was home that Saturday. Thankful I chose to snuggle him on the floor all morning. Thankful each and every night before going to bed, I hugged him and told him I loved him.

When he gave me the look I couldnt control myself anymore... and D walking by asked me what was wrong. I am sure he didnt expect me to say " I think Jax is dying" - but when I did, he did the right thing, hugged me and echoed T's sentiments of taking him to the vet.  It was a snow storm though, and all the emergency vets were in the city. Our regular vet was closed. D went online and found out that one of the other clinics in town was open. With a tiny shard of hope in my heart, that they could just give him some medicine and he would be better, we went off to the vet in town.

I sat in the backseat with him on that slushy snowy car ride to town. Held his head in my lap, burying my fingers deep in his winter fluffies. I must give credit to the clinic we went to - they were great. When we walked in - D carrying Ajax- they rushed us right into a room and a vet came right away to see him. I was a mess, but I tried really hard to answer all the questions they wanted to know - how old is he? 13.5 What happened? He is old.... What did you notice that was wrong? His breathing, he couldnt walk, he peed, [he had also pooped when we came in.. ] his tongue and gums were getting paler.

They went through their analysis, the vet and her assistant, while I sat on the floor, touching as much of him as I could. I wanted him to know he wasnt alone in this strange place. He was never alone. When the vet finished her assessment, she said what I knew, but what I didnt want to hear -"He is trying to die" She said. My heart broke. Clean in two, Im sure. She said likely his internal organs were shutting down, or some kind of heart failure. His heartbeat was already really slow, and obviously with the uncontrolled pee and poop, that was a terrible sign. I made the choice, the one I never wanted to have to make, to help him slip those final few steps to peace. And I hugged him and told him how much I loved him the whole time. He was never alone.

Just like that... in the space of a few hours, my best friend for more than a decade was gone. No more patrolling the property line, no more bad summer haircuts, no more summer shed brambles rolling around until fall, no more inopportune flopping in front of me while I walk, begging for a belly rub.

I cried for a long time. I dont envy the position of vet clinic staff in those moments.

Then they finally had to ask - "What did you want to do with him now?" Obviously, they have that service, where they do... I dont even know what with bodies of passed animals. I panicked and just wanted to say YOU CANT HAVE HIM HE'S MINE. But its winter. What can I do? A quiet voice in my head said Go to Russell. So I made D call my dad. It was a quick phone call. "We had to put Jax down, can you bury him please?" "Yes, bring him to my house" and that was done. Thank goodness. I am so grateful that on that day, my dad was home, and free, and has a backhoe that can dig through snow and frozen ground to give my best friend the burial and honor he deserves.

Finally I was able to compose myself just enough to be able to get Jax back in the car, and get home to switch vehicles so I could take him on his final trip to Russell. I cried the whole way there. Sometimes I would get some control over myself, but mostly it was awful. I dont actually know how I made it there, but I made a point to keep two hands on the wheel and my focus on the road....

I had been texting with T this whole time. I cant even imagine how she felt getting the text simply saying "hes gone" .... I hate that I had to do that to her, but I am so infinitely grateful that, without hesitation, she was on her way to dads too. Jax was her friend too.

I passed dad on the road to Russell as I was heading to his house. He was on his was to the Garage to pick up the backhoe. Probably better that way. T and I met at dads and just hugged each other and cried for a long time.

Finally dad came back with the backhoe, and after more hugs and tears, we went into the field to dig a hole. He dig a nice hole, by a nice tree. Jax went out in true Russell style, charioted to his resting place proudly in the backhoe bucket, between T and I . How many times have I ridden around in that bucket? Countless. I never thought it would be for that reason though. I never thought I would have to get in that bucket to escort Jax to his final nap.

After one final hug and ruffling of his fluffy scruff, Dad reverently laid Jax down - and for that I am thankful. I looked away while he covered him... that part I couldnt watch. And then it was done. Just like that... I needed some way to mark it. So comemorate the amazing partner in crime that he was, so dad took the bucket and scratched some bark of a tree and gave me his knife to carve his name with. It seemed that when they do that in movies, the trees are not made of real bark, and it was much harder than anticipated. Dad got his chainsaw though, and made it permanent. His name in a tree, while he overlooks the river and the hayfield, forever at peace now.

And so the Era of Ajax comes to a close. He was so loved and touched so many lives with his infections joy and conversation. Nothing will ever be the same. 

  - S

Sunday, January 5, 2014

What a Cool Horse!

WOW I met a cool horse today!! He may just be the horse of my dreams...

He is a six year old Connemara Thoroughbred gelding. Nothing flashy, just medium bay with a star. He is a pretty good size, maybe 15.3. He can move like a floaty cloud. Just wow. This boy OOOOZZZES charisma. There is just something about him... that *it* factor, is there in spades!

His temperment is amazing - he is a total LBE. Confident, playful, spirited, curious! Smart, brave, athletic! He belongs to the barn owner where I was going for a lesson, and since the owner is away on vacation, my student is going to start playing with him until she can return.

He has never done any Parelli before, so we were going to start at the beginning with him. When she brought him into the arena though, he was basically a kite. A happy, confident, exuberant kite, but a kite none the less. He was NOT going to stand still, and he was basically trotting and cantering circles around my student, occasionally bucking when she accidentally pulled on the lead or he hit the end of it. Poor guy just wanted to MOVE! With all the ice rain we have had, there is a good crust on all the snow, so the horses dont want to move through it. With this being his first adventure into the arena in months, he was just happy to have good footing!

As soon as it was safely possible, we got the lead off of him and just let him move his feet! WOW. Just wow. Thats all. :) He ran, he played, he bucked, he goofed off, he tested our bubble, and then he asked a question. It was such an interesting thing, watching him play around. Everything he did had a purpose. He checked out every obstacle in the arena. He cantered circles near us, moving about two inches closer to us [we were in the corner, protecting all the things he could get tangled in or hurt on] He just kept testing the bubble. How close can I get to you guys before you move your feet? Luckily I was armed with a carrot stick so I was able to just claim my space, without managing to offend him.

What was really cool about him was how EXPRESSIVE he is. If you just claimed space, he was totally fine with getting out of the way, even if he got tagged. IF he felt like I was coming after him, or being unfair, he bucked! What a goof! I love that dignity! I hope no one ever takes it away from him :)

Once he had moved his feet, he became very curious about us people! He would check in and move off and check in and move off, so we started tracking him, since he was more walking/trotting now, rather than cantering/bucking. He was immediately curious, and basically ended up giving us small liberty circles, yielding his hind quarters as we followed him. It was amazing!

The whole key was to shape what he was already offering, and not give him anything to brace on - part of the reason we stayed at liberty! He followed us all over the arena after that, checked out the tarp, checked out the brush jump and poles on the ground. All four feet on the tarp and he jumped the jump on his own. He got fixated on the door for a bit, because his buddy was out there, so we went over and claimed the door as our space. He figured it out pretty quick and really started softening and offering to connect and come over without bowling us over!

We played with him from our spot. sometimes he would fixate on the outside, so we would see how little it took to get him to refocus. He was so light!

To finish, the student connected with him and walked over to where the lead rope was and took him out. He tried to revert to his usual pushy self so I had to remind her to treat him with zero brace and just yield his hind quarters without pulling to get him to focus. As soon as she did that, he was soft and connected and everything went wonderfully. She said it was the best he has been about turning out through the gate :)

What a cool horse!!!! I had so much fun playing with him :)

:)
S

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Happy New Year!

Today is officially the first day of a new year - this wild and crazy year of 2014!  Which, coincidentally, is also the Chinese Year of the Horse. How cool is that?

Of course the traditional thing to do to kick off a new year is lay down some resolutions or goals. I have a few so far.

     1- I would like to become more physically flexible. This will help my riding and general comfort in life, and it is something I have really neglected since... forever. I think playing with flexibility on a continued basis will also help out my club foot situation so I can be more balanced.
     2 - I plan to become 'extraneous' debt free in 2014. Obviously, I will still have a mortgage [barring a lottery win!] but I have a plan to pay off all other debts owing.
     3 - I will set aside actual planned time with my own horses, and not let them slide by the wayside because I get to busy teaching/training other people and horses. Especially poor Zephyr! The Phyr-Child will be grown enough physically to be able to do more, so I can use that 'excuse' for her any more. Id like to accomplish some L3 auditions with Zephyr this summer.
    4 - I plan to attend as many learning experiences as I can justifiably accomplish, given resolution #2. Progression is key to motivation for me. Whether horse related or not!  

One of the things I decided to randomly start doing this year too, was something that was floating around facebook - its to start a savings jar. Each week you put the dollar amount in the jar that corresponds to the week numer - IE: this week one dollar, next week two dollars... etc...  http://thehousemadehome.blogspot.ca/2013/06/52-week-money-challenge-are-you-game.html
It seems like a great way to save money without really noticing, because the most you will ever put it, in a week will be $52! But as each week adds on to the last, you will end up with over a thousand dollars by this time next year :) Who doesnt want to start the new year with a little extra cash?

There was another thing I saw on facebook that I plan to do too - its another jar. I like jars I guess. But in this one, you write notes of all the amazing things, the fun things, the silly things, the OH BOY things, and you put them all in the jar. So you can remember how amazing the past year was when you get to this time of year and start reminiscing again. As someone who wishes they blogged more about the little things in life, this caters to me perfectly :) Now I just have to find some jars/bowls/buckets!


Happy New Year everyone, I hope it is filled with joy, laughter and of course lots of horses!

:)
S